Divorce is usually one of the most difficult times in a person’s life. However, it does not have to be a war. Keeping things civil with your soon-to-be former spouse is possible. It should be a priority so you can save time and money and hopefully preserve the relationship, if necessary.
Communicate well and often
One of the most important things you can do to keep things civil between you and your soon-to-be former spouse is to communicate openly with them and their attorney. If you have an attorney, which is always a good idea, speak with them before you talk to the other party to ensure you protect yourself.
Constructive communication between the two parties can mean the difference between a short, amicable divorce and a lengthy, drawn-out litigation process that can take months or sometimes years, so communicate well and communicate often.
Focus on the big things
Divorce involves many aspects of your life, from the most significant, like children and family, to minor things, like who gets to keep the dining room table. Focusing on the big picture allows you to stay levelheaded and rational instead of feeling like you are all over the place, trying to make decisions about everything.
There will be time to talk about everything. Remember that your attorney has done this many times before, and there is a process and a time for every conversation you need to have.
Consider mediation
Mediation is an effective way of solving problems. If your relationship with the other party is amicable enough, or they are at least willing to enter mediation, discuss this with your attorney. It is possible that the parties and their attorneys can sit down and have a conversation to try to settle.
Stay in control of your emotions
Divorce is a highly emotional process. Feeling big emotions is normal and part of the process. However, allowing those emotions to drive the process is an entirely different choice. For this reason, having an attorney is essential because they can help you remain centered and aligned with what you truly want.
Divorce is complicated—there’s no doubt about it. However, it does not have to equal warfare. There are things you can do to make the process easier for yourself, the other party, and your entire family.